"Specify Type of Goat."
A recent re-visitation to
tvtropes.org reminded me of that most dreaded rule of all: Rule 34, which states that if there's a fandom for it, regardless of what that might be, there's also porn of it. Go ahead: pick a random fandom and play Google Seppuku. There's a squick-filled fic out there of it.
Harry Potter? There are entire
archives devoted to these.
Calvin and Hobbes? Hey, there's an icon about that one. (Spoilers: be afraid. Be VERY afraid.)
Transformers? Hell, that one's a semi-canonical manga called
Transformers Kiss!
So I sat there for a little while, reflecting on all the scary fanfiction-filled things lurking out on the Net. And it suddenly occurred to me: what would LOLcat porn sound like? Lo and behold, the following LOLcat conversation immediately popped into my head....
"Oh hai's. I haz cheezburger...in mai pants!"
"O rly?"
"Erekshun. I has it. Blowjob plz."
"Is so big! Nom nom
nom nom nom nom...."
"Noes!!!1! Fellatio: ur doin it wrong."
Sadly, the odds are that despite having only snippets of dialogue, your brain has already turned against you and created a series of still-pictures featuring kitties and word bubbles. I'm sure I'll apologize once I stop gleefully cackling. And no, I will not pay to shampoo your carpet after your brain explodes out the back of your skull in an attempt to burn these aforementioned images from your mind.
But not one to be outdone, in a completely unrelated conversation, Mel somehow conjured up the image of Mokona dressing up as Akio Ohtori and commandeering the Akiocar in order to secude the entire Utena cast. Of course, after the conjuring she was horrified to discover that she couldn't rid her brain of Mokona on the hood of a red Stingray convertible, with a purple wig and an open shirt flapping in the breeze.
Apparently I'm to blame for this somehow.
I probably am too, in some twisted way.
Labels: LOLporn, Rule 34 and you
posted by Phillip at 8:51 PM
